Quotable RHONY: 11×10

The housewives in New York City are out of control and I have the quotes and the countdown to prove it.

Cringest Quotes

1. Luann

Image result for luann de lesseps season 11

“What, is Bethenny going to go home and watch her daughter sleep? Because, it’s Halloween; it’s 11:00 at night. I mean, isn’t the kid sleeping?”

You. Ungrateful. Peasant. I can’t even with Luann right now! How DARE she say that about Bethenny?! First, you make B come out on a night she even has her daughter with her, second, you don’t come down to see the ladies or invite them up to see you before the show, and last, you don’t start your performance on time! I’m sure I’ll hear something like, “She started 9 minutes late! Bethenny couldn’t stay?” I don’t have children yet, but I’m fairly certain if you have to relieve your babysitter, than you have to go.

I thought the Luann “too big for her britches cabaret star”  story line was just to spruce up the season, but it’s very much true that she’s really feeling herself right now on the show. From not wanting the fish room, to talking shiz about Bethenny in the salon, to this. Get over yourself Countess!

Image result for luann bethenny bethenny bethenny gif

I suppose her reckoning is coming though, if you watched the mid-season trailer or if you’ve read recently headlines claiming she can’t stay sober. I should probably cut her some slack because she has an uphill climb, but that also doesn’t excuse her insensitive comments so far this season.

2. Tinsley

Image result for tinsley mortimer clown

“I figure if you’re going to lose it, and be so hysterical and emotional, you might as well do it looking like a clown, with a big bow on your head and like, pink cheeks.”

Yes, Tinsley, we can all see the big bow and the pink cheeks you’re wearing; you don’t have to remind us every episode. And quit acting like you were all embarrassed by your costume; you know you loved it.

Yay you for getting back into society … if getting back into society is having the Big Apple Circus announce your name and give you one line to say. Yay you for being strong and ending things with Scott … if being strong about it is getting drunk and hysterically crying over him. Yay you for having such a strong relationship with your mother … if having a strong relationship is relying on her like a child.

I know I know, I’m going hard on Tinsley too, and I do realize all she wants is a family. But, why does that have to define her? Why can’t she be strong on her own or put herself out there to meet the man of her dreams? Or heck, pull an Andy Cohen and get a baby before you get a man!? My annoyance with Tinsley comes from the fact that I just want to shake her, remind her how great her life is, and tell her to grow the F up!

3. Ramona

Image result for real housewives of new york season 11 dorinda

“I have lots of friends, so everyone can’t be invited; I’m sorry!”

As if her social climbing attempts that were caught on film this season haven’t been enough, plus the fact that she wants all these people to throw her birthday parties, Ramona helped create one of the most uncomfortable speeches in housewives’ history. THEN she had the audacity to blame it on Dorinda and Sonja (personally it was all three of their faults, but I like to put the majority of the blame on Ramona).

“Hello! You’re the one who reached me! [wtf does that even mean?!] I’m hosting and I invited you to co-chair, like why are you interrupting my speech? After I talk, then you talk.”

Riiiiight Ramona, because you’re the only one who ever has anything important to say.

4. Dorinda

Image result for real housewives of new york season 11 dorinda

“There you go. Important. Important. Don’t ever do that to me again. Don’t ever …”

I don’t necessarily judge Dorinda for her comments this week; she’s said much worse in the past. But, she was a part of that whole speech fiasco and she did interrupt Ramona (which she has a tendency to do), thus she made the list … if only because she contributed to us viewers having to watch part of the episode with one eye shut due to the awkwardness of it all.

However … not everything the women said this week was terrible because the ….

Greatest Quote Goes to

Sonja

Screenshot 2019-05-11 at 12.00.53 PM

“The best thing that Luann could do right now is do what every other diva does; they just say ‘I didn’t mean to miss you all. I couldn’t find you.’ Don’t be defensive! That’s not the answer! You needed to come over and kiss our rings …… we’re divas too!” 

While she may have been unhinged a few week’s back with the “f***ing Morgan letters!!” Sonja is more and more becoming the voice of reason for all the ladies. Plus, she calls out each of her friends when they are wrong. She stood up for Bethenny when Luann was trying to shame her for leaving the performance early, and she called out Ramona for her birthday party comments, her actions toward Harry, & the entire Birdie/Bridie fiasco. Sonja wins this week for me!

Honorable Mention:
Bethenny

Screenshot 2019-05-11 at 12.16.43 PM

I realize Bethenny was also in this episode, but mainly it was her running to and from events, so I don’t have any specific quotes to shame or applaud her for. I’m quite sure she had some great comments in her interviews (as she always always does), plus it looks like next week she starts to come for Luann, which I’m ready for, but nothing too memorable this week for me to mention. Well, except for this …

Image result for real housewives of new york shalloween

Thumbs up or down?

Weekly Bravo Recap

First Up: The Real Housewives of Atlanta

Image result for real housewives of atlanta season 11 finale

Kenya comes back for one episode and stirs up a ton of drama?? Bring her back full time!! But before we get into the Kenya of it all, Porsha’s gender reveal party took place.  Between her awful hair and the fact that the set up was a disaster, it’s no wonder Porsha broke down. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a housewife event as busted as that one. And the poppers didn’t even work either; hers was blue, while everyone else’s was pink! HAHAHA! Sheesh … oh well, it looked like the party ended up being really fun. Congrats to Porsha and Dennis on their baby girl!

But now let’s get to the meat and potatoes of this finale: the return of  Kenya Moore.

Screenshot 2019-03-31 at 7.34.36 PM

First, I love love love Cynthia, but the demographic of people drinking Seagrams (college girls) are probs not watching Bravo. I know this because I interviewed one a while ago: Interview with a Gen Z. Seagrams is also just gross, and as the women brought up, contains like no alcohol. However, if Cynthia partnering with Seagrams brings back Kenya and causes drama, I’m here for it.

I kind of see how Cynthia wouldn’t tell Nene that Kenya was attending her event because we all know how Nene would react. In fact, Nene probably would have stayed home. While it was strange for Kenya to get up front and center on the mic to make a toast, it seemed like everyone (*ahem* Porsha) but Nene was fine with her there.

It looks likes Nene’s issue with Kenya’s attendance wasn’t ending, it was exploding, seeing as the finale was extended 15 extra minutes, so Nene and Cynthia could have it out. Hearing the audio that Cynthia and Kandi were “on the same page” about not knowing Kenya was coming means they knew she was coming, or was it that they needed to be on the “same page” about the possibility of her coming? Regardless, go look at Nene’s social media; she had some words to say about her and Cynthia’s friendship. Here’s to looking so forward to next Sunday; be sure to stay turned for my recap of the Atlanta reunion once it’s aired entirely!

Next: Vanderpump Rules

Image result for vanderpump rules season 7 mexico

“Puke and rally, puke puke and rally!” Gah, is there anything better than a Vanderpump vacation to Mexico? Being pregnant and 30, I’ve forgotten what a s***show one can become when drunk … let’s examine, shall we?

Type A: Stassi — the drunk in which the world revolves around you, no one can tell you no, and where maybe you don’t want to get up and dance because you’re wearing a freaking maxi dress with Spanx (or you’re just too drunk).

Type B: Ariana — the type of drunk where you are making absolutely no sense to anyone around you, yet, in your brain you’re freaking Albert Einstein.

Type C: Beau — aka the crier. That scene with Stassi and him discussing their “issues” and how their pasts (well mainly Stassi’s past) affects their relationship …. at one point, my husband turned it me and said, “Oh my goshhhh their so drunk.”

Image result for vanderpump rules season 7 mexico

Most notable moments from the episode included: the fomo infomercial, Jax giving Stassi actual, solid advice, and everyone just getting along. If I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again … I could watch an entire season, sans drama, of just the group getting along. I love their crazy ass friendships, and I am waiting for the adoption papers to be signed so I can join!

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Image result for kyle and lisa fight season 9

Am I the only one a little underwhelmed by the LVP/Kyle fight? Except for Kyle being honest/standing up to Lisa for once, and Lisa raising her voice more than normal, nothing really shocked me. That came at the end though, back to the beginning of the episode.

We’re on episode EIGHT of this season and yet we’re still discussing this Vanderpump dog issue: the opening scene was at the shelter, Teddi’s charity cycle event was to raise money for the shelter, we needed to know who leaked the story about Dorit’s dog from the shelter, let’s watch CNN at the shelter!

Image result for taylor armstrong enough gif

However, “real friends show up” and that means go to lunch together after a cycle class. Who would have ever guessed that Denise would be the voice of reason in this whole saga, first questioning why LVP couldn’t make both events that day, then being the first person to ask Kyle if she’s ever known Lisa to leak a story to the press, and finally giving Dorit a press peptalk … a “presstalk!” At the same time, I enjoyed seeing the women band together against LVP (although I was totes shocked when Rinna called her “Lisa Vandertrump” later on in the episode, for realsies #notcool).

I felt like the entire episode went by so fast, and before I knew it I had ten minutes left to watch Kyle and Lisa argue. My only real thought watching was why would Lisa and Ken get beyond defensive if they did nothing wrong? I can see how Lisa would be hurt because the one person who always defends her is now questioning her, but after Adrienne and the surrogate, Camille and Taylor’s husband, Brandi and the suitcase magazines, Yolanda and the Munchhausen,  to this … what is Kyle supposed to think? When does Kyle actually get to probe Lisa? The time is now my friends, and I can’t wait to watch it all unfold in the next coming weeks!

Lastly: The Real Housewives of New York

… which, I decided to just watch as a fan this week, instead of blog. I promise to write a RHONY post soon, perhaps the Berkshires next week? For now, I am #TeamBrunette & #TeamSonjaMorgan so far this season!

Image result for real housewives of new york season 11

Keep following for more Bravo related content, celeb content, reality TV content, and more!!

“She Just Set You All Up” #RHOBH Recap

“Grief is a process nobody teaches you …” 

I’m trying really hard to have that be the theme of my post today, but all I can keep thinking is …

Image result for sniper from the side gif

Before we get into the Lucy Lucy Apple Juice (wtf) of it all, let’s start at the beginning of Season 9. It opened with a horrendous fight between Kyle and Lisa (and Ken). Honestly, I hate when Bravo does this because it lasts less than a minute, then switches to what, two months prior and Teddi’s new home? Ugh. Just start from Teddi’s house; why get me all worked up and excited for a blow up in the first place, to then take it away from me before it’s over?

I had originally planned to blog the premier episode, but I thought it was overrated and I walked away annoyed. I was annoyed by the Erika/Dorit friendship, I was annoyed watching Rinna work out with her daughters (and goats), I was annoyed Kyle was starting the same fight with Lisa from last year (“You like Dorit more than me”), and I was annoyed that LVP got any personal airtime because she basically has two shows and that’s beyond frustrating for me.

Image result for housewives eye roll gif

Oh, and to top it all off, I am so not here for Denise Richards. Liiiike, what makes you cool enough to be the new housewife, marrying Charlie Sheen? Teddi saying, “#Hashtag Winning” to remind us all of it (as if the ladies don’t discuss it enough) was stupid, and to top it all off Richards can’t even dress correctly to roll with this group. Teddi is the hippie with the laid back style, remember? We don’t need Denise. UGH and if Rinna says one more thing about how she was an actress or how she knew so and so or was friends with so and so …

Image result for housewives eye roll gif

Things are looking up though, which just goes to show you should never judge a housewives’ season based off the premier! While episode two was also a bit boring, in real life it brought us a Twitter feud we didn’t know we needed between Rinna, Harry Hamlin, and Nicolette Sheridan.

Screenshot 2019-02-27 at 5.36.16 PM

Apparently, (which Rinna blabbed on the show) Nicolette Sheridan was married to Harry, went to a Michael Bolton concert one night, and that was the end of their marriage. Sheridan went to Twitter to say that wasn’t true.

Screenshot 2019-02-27 at 5.38.34 PM

As Lisa was telling the story, the other women were all …

Image result for lisa rinna cheers to michael bolton quote

yet Rinna was all …

Image result for lisa rinna cheers to michael bolton quote

“Cheers to Michael Bolton”

Anything to stay relevant is Rinna’s way. Moving right along … let’s get to the Bahamas!

Image result for real housewives of beverly hills bahamas

To recover from her robbery, (anyone else not know she was robbed?) Dorit planned an early in the season trip for the women. If you follow my posts, you know I love me a good housewives’ trip and this one was no exception. Finally, the ladies came to provide some entertainment and many of my thoughts from the first episode shifted: Dorit isn’t that bad, the show is clearly not overrated, and LVP may still deserve sympathy for her brother’s death, but this season she is messy as hell.

I thought the Dog Gate of Season 9 was over and done with, but is any issue ever really solved with these ladies? It was so obvious LVP was pissed at Dorit because she could not stop making digs at her. I counted five during this episode (Not to mention how utterly ridiculous LVP was to Erika regarding the sympathy note … I can’t and I shan’t! #toaster … but for real, I’m not even getting into that because it was insanely dumb).

Image result for erika jayne eye roll

I find it so so so SO hard to believe that Rinna didn’t know about the dog drama, but once she did know, man did she tell all she knew: “Guess who came to the table to play?”

Image result for guilty as charged gif

Once that dinner started, it couldn’t be stopped. I loved how Denise had no idea what was going on and Camille did her best to explain. I could go into it all, but I think the ladies said it best:

I had nothing to do with any of it.”

                              “It wouldn’t be out there if you didn’t want it out there.”

“She’s acting like she’s so confused why Dorit’s upset.”

                              “I would love to say I’m shocked, but I’m not.”

“I love Lisa, but that doesn’t mean I’m blind.”

Image result for housewives eye roll gif

Again, I want to have sympathy for LVP because she’s going through an extremely hard time and as Rinana did say, we don’t really learn a proper way to grieve. But, at the end of the day … this was a set up. Guess we’ll find out more next week!

 

New Jersey Reunion: Round 1

Image result for in this corner

Jackie, Melissa, Margaret

Image result for in this corner gif

Teresa, Dolores, Jennifer

Image result for let's get ready to rumble gif

Who will come out on top?

Teresa

Image result for teresa giudice season 9 reunion

I was suuuuuper shocked that the first question right out of the gate was to Tre about Joe being deported. However, in classic Andy fashion, he told us we’d get into it all later, aka part three of the reunion.

What we didn’t have to wait for was Teresa going after Jackie. Teresa definitely made her point that Jackie wasn’t allowed to come for her because if you’re not with Teresa, (or “on the Teresa show”) then you’re against her. Tre drove this home be saying something about looking around the room, noticing that anyone who ever attacked Teresa was gone and off the show.

Margaret

Image result for margaret josephs season 9 reunion

looked amazing, absolutely amazing! Her face, shoes, dress, earrings, EVERYTHING was “on point.”  Plus when going up against Jennifer (again), Margaret handed herself well. Girl earned her seat next to Andy.

Melissa

Image result for melissa gorga season 9 reunion

can never do anything right, yet I agree with Jackie that Melissa has become the number one girl in this group (referring to when Jackie called her the Carrie). I think some of the other women can’t handle this … or maybe just one woman. I couldn’t believe Teresa said Melissa needed to be on the other couch, in referencing alliances. No longer am I confused about why Melissa is in so much trouble with Teresa at the reunion. Melissa didn’t agree with Tre on certain issues this season and in the end, it’s looking as if Melissa sided with those “against Teresa.”

Also, did Melissa call Teresa irrational??

Jennifer

Image result for melissa gorga season 9 reunion

After hating Jennifer in the beginning of the season, to growing to like her by the finale, she was able to make me go back to hating her in just the first ten minutes of the reunion. She sounded so dumb talking about Oklahoma. Just because you’re a city person doesn’t mean you can hate hate hate on how or where others live. We already went through this already with Vicki Gunvalson.

Image result for vicki gunvalson oklahoma gif

Speaking of hate, or maybe more of a dislike, I was shocked that Margaret v. Jennifer would be brought up so soon.  After reaching what I thought was a reasonable bit of closure to their disagreements during the season, at the reunion Jennifer went and called Marge Senior a “homewrecker.” Damn girl, say whatever you want about Margaret, but it’s an extremely low blow when you go insulting someone’s mother. Perhaps it even shows the kind of person you are …

Jackie

Screenshot 2019-02-20 at 5.30.43 PM

“Took on Teresa and lived to tell about it.”

I will admit that after the picture of Jackie at Teresa’s book signing came out, it was hard for me to look at her the same way I had since the start of the season. I really liked Jackie from day one, but that picture made my thoughts shift to her having a possible agenda being on the show, a “I want to be famous” agenda. But stalker (??) I’m not so sure. Then again, maybe Jackie wants to be forever known as the one who took Teresa down … ???

Dolores

Screenshot 2019-02-20 at 5.24.40 PM

I COMPLETELY forgot that Andy was the one to spill the beans to Dolores about Frank being disbarred. However, I ship Frelores hardcore. Based off what she said on the reunion though, she seems pretty serious about her boyfriend, David. Buuuut, I predict that on the next season Frank will be around just as often as he’s always been. 

Still to come

I’ll be back to recap once parts two & three have aired. I’m looking forward to hearing Joe’s thoughts on the Melissa/Teresa feud, plus the Danielle of it all! Until next time, don’t lose your mind, don’t flip any tables, and keep your lip liner tight like a baboon!

Image result for jackie goldschneider season 9 reunion

“No Children, No Parents, No Husbands” — We Gotta Talk About Jersey!

Tequila, monkeys’ assholes, & broken glasses

Jersey is BACK! After many seasons of snoozeville, The Real Housewives of New Jersey has returned with the heat … and I’m not just talking about the weather in Mexico.

Image result for jennifer aydin gif

Let’s begin with that first dinner in Cabo… 

I think it all starts with Jennifer drinking. Listen, do I blame her for getting white girl wasted in Mexico? Hell to the no … we’ve all been there. I gave myself a black eye once in Mexico when I slipped and my face broke my fall. However, Jennifer calling Teresa’s gift ugly (drunk or not) was inappropriate and rude.

Image result for jennifer aydin

I also find it interesting that Margaret can say whatever she wants in response, fully sober, and yet for me, she’s never wrong. The obvious housewife response to Jennifer’s necklace attack is a returned below the belt comment. The Marg did what the show asks of her with the whole lip liner looks like a monkey’s asshole comment.

Image result for margaret josephs season 9

And while I may be Team Margaret (& probably always will be), Jennifer’s response of “Yeah, a monkey’s asshole, that you f***ing sucked, probably!” will forever go down in housewives history along with

  • “Get off my jock”
  • “Who gon’ check me boo?”
  • “Jesus jugs”

and “Prostitution whore!” You can watch the women’s reaction to the whole argument here.

Image result for margaret josephs and jennifer aydin mexico

Honestly, thank you ladies. It was amazing television.

But wait, we aren’t done …

The sun did come out eventually and tempers cooled off, yet, round two was coming. While the ladies did enjoy some pool and shopping time (who takes their Chanel bag out on the streets of Mexico?), at the second dinner (was it really only the second dinner?), Marg and Jennifer were back out at it again. I don’t even remember how it all got brought up, but in true housewife fashion, past comments never really die. The conversation turned to the remarks Jennifer had made about Margaret’s mother cheating with a married man, as Margaret did herself. The Marg fired back with comments about Jennifer’s husband sleeping in the pool house and having a girlfriend.

Image result for margaret josephs and jennifer aydin mexico

Relive that here.

Anyone who thought Margaret was a terrible human for the comments she made at this dinner is so wrong because The Marg immediately apologized when Jennifer returned to the table (what, less than 10 minutes after making the mean comments), and told Jennifer she said them just to hurt her and there was no truth in the comments. This is honestly huge because apologies in the housewives’ world can take weeks, months, and even years to produce. Margaret admitted right away she was wrong.

Image result for margaret josephs mexico

While it seemed the dust was finally settling in Cabo, a hurricane called Danielle Staub was brewing, and broken glass, threats, & fueled tempers would be left in her wake.

Image result for margaret josephs and jennifer aydin mexico

If you haven’t caught on yet this season, please realize in New Jersey, you do not mention children, parents, or husbands in an argument. Danielle is so slimy, of course she brings up Margaret’s children (& even her grandchildren) in an argument that I’m not even sure where it started in the first place. (Can’t these ladies have one nice dinner on vacation?). Margaret being the queen of the trip she is, took Delores’s wine (because why waste her own drink) and threw it at Danielle. My favorite part of this whole scene was by the time everyone stood up and Danielle was ready to retaliate, Margaret was already walking up the stair, sashaying in that green dress of hers.

Image result for margaret josephs and jennifer aydin mexico

“Had Danielle talked about my children, she’d have no teeth left.”

“Teresa, this one [points to Danielle] has you going in f***ing circles.”

The drama didn’t stop there because Melissa then got upset that someone broke or threw a glass at her (while she was pointing fingers at Danielle and Jennifer). This led to crazy-eyed Jennifer to break another glass, hold a shard of it at Melissa, and say something along the lines of “if I threw a glass at you, you’d know”

Image result for jennifer aydin mexico

Yeah … that man in the scene? That’s security.

Image result for holy hell gif

Who’s exhausted at this point and just wants to fly home to Jersey? On this week’s episode the girls did just that, and even appeared to eventually all make up: Teresa and Melissa, Teresa and Margaret, Jennifer and Dolores, Jennifer and Melissa. But where was Danielle?

The Danielle of It All …

Image result for danielle staub mexico

This shady bitch (in my opinion) is the sole cause of many arguments this season. You can “boo hoo” all you want about how horrible she was treated on social media regarding her behavior on the show, but honey, you signed up for all this.

Image result for don't call me honey gif

First, her treatment of Margaret and all the women at her wedding was absolutely atrocious. While she did apologize for it on WWHL with Andy, still not okay. After her wedding, she was still twisting words to show Margaret in a terrible light with the other ladies. And finally, at the explosive, glass shattering dinner in Mexico, Danielle was the one to bring up the Marg/Jennifer fight (which had already been squashed), and then wouldn’t let the conflict go by taking it to another level discussing Margaret’s kids.

Image result for you're garbage joe gorga gif

I have nothing even left to say about Snobielle Stupid Staub; we’ll let her run her mouth at the reunion. Speaking of the reunion, it sounds like it’s set to be explosive, AND it’s sooner than you think because next week is the RHONJ season finale.

Image result for real housewives of new jersey sad gif

Overall, this season has redeemed New Jersey as queens in the housewives’ universe and I can not freaking wait for the next coming weeks as we wrap up it all up!

 

Atlanta Takes Tokyo

and Marlo loses her bag …

Image result for marlo hampton gif

If my favorite thing about watching Housewives is the reunions, then my second favorite has to be cast trips. The ladies of Atlanta are currently (well currently on the show) visiting Tokyo, Japan.

Image result for tokyo gif

The looks have been on point, the antics have made me laugh, and the drama has been reeeeal!

“She gonna murder one of us tonight; I can feel it”

Eva vs. Everything

Sweet, hippie Eva can’t seem to catch a break this trip. First, she gets into it with Porsha regarding the shady comments Eva’s been making all season. What I took from Porsha was that Eva needs to just own when she’s been shady, because as Nene was saying, if you’re going to throw shade in this group of women, “someone will call you out” on it.

However, Eva owned it all when she went up against Marlo, which honestly has been a long time coming this season between these two

Image result for marlo and eva

I was proud of Eva for standing her ground against Marlo, plus Eva needed a win after receiving the horrible news regarding her grandfather. We need to keep Eva in all our prayers because re-watching and reliving it back now for her probably really sucks.

Nene

I think this trip is showing Nene in one of her most honest lights. By that I mean, Greg’s health is breaking her down, and the Tokyo trip is her breaking point. First, there was her argument with Tanya, where I kind of saw both sides. I thought Nene’s comment about “marrying someone else” at the temple could’ve been taken as rude. I also think the reason Nene stormed out of the sushi restaurant was because she couldn’t really defend her comment; it was ill-mannered. At the same time Tanya girl, get thicker skin. But, maybe Nene left because she was tired and just over it all. She made a comment and didn’t mean anything serious by it, or that’s how she defended it. For once, with this “feud” I saw all sides, mostly because a) I’m (overly) sensitive like Tanya, but b) I know Nene can say whatever she wants to people regardless of consequences. If this disagreement tells us anything, it’s that Tanya may not be cut out to be a housewife and Nene (as mentioned) is breaking, if not already broken.

Image result for nene gif

Speaking of Nene, she got left! Porsha’s comment about her murdering someone could not have been more real; I was terrified for that sweet tour guide, who not only had to endure the back and forth between Eva and Marlo, but basically had to babysit these women the entire trip, telling them to be quiet and to be on time. WHICH, I just can not get over that the ladies had the audacity to be 30-45 minutes late the first day, after specifically being told the night before to be on time. In the end, sweet tour guide didn’t come to play when she finally left Nene.

Final Thoughts & Next Week

Closing, I loved how Porsha announced her pregnancy and I’m excited to see her journey the rest of the season. I totally related to Kandi regarding food on the trip; I’ve traveled to China before and like Kandi, I do not have an exotic pallet. Lastly, how great was the Xscape karaoke moment between all the women? I loved that they were bonding, getting along, and singing Kandi’s song!  

Image result for atlanta housewives tokyo

Next week Tokyo continues for the ladies and looks to include strippers, samurai, probably more sushi, a breakdown from Nene, and a spilled secret from Kandi about Dennis.

Image result for cant wait gif

One Thing Before We Go …

Image result for andy cohen baby shower

THIS. WAS. THE. MOST. EPIC. EVENT. I. NEVER. THOUGHT. COULD. HAPPEN. AND. DIDN’T. KNOW. I. NEEDED. TO. HAPPEN!!!

Image result for andy cohen baby shower

From Rinna screaming at all of them to dance, to Kyle’s dirty suit at the end of the night, to the overall amazing and beautiful guestlist. It was just a magical adult version of a fairy tale and solidified, SOLIDIFIED my Housewife love!

Image result for andy cohen baby shower

Image result for andy cohen baby shower

Who’s Watching this Season of VPR?

Who am I kidding? What a dumb question! Of course we all are watching the newest season of the best show on Bravo: Vanderpump Rules. With only a few episodes in, drama has already ensured, but  first, “let’s gooo back … back to the beginning.”

Image result for come clean gif hillary

“I feel comfortable using Hilary Duff lyrics in everyday life”

Jax and Brittany’s Engagement

Image result for brittany and jax engaged

After finding out this summer, or whenever, they got engaged via social media, I could not WAIT to see it happen on the show. I genuinely genuinely believe Jax was nervous in the moment and that nothing was staged or faked. Since the engagement, I have been a strong follower of these two, mainly to watch Jax’s every move. It’s not that I’m suspecting him to ruin this current good thing with Britt, but we’re all a tad cautious he may screw something up, right? However, I get no greater joy than seeing them as a happy couple. Since their engagement, they’ve been traveling everywhere (mainly with Lala and Randall; and btw, who else lives for the Jax and Randall bromance??), plus Jax and Britt are seriously wedding planning (Kentucky castle, hello!).

I plan on enjoying the rest of the season with them in a joyous bliss, so Tom Sandoval can step off for thinking this isn’t true love, but rather Jax being in an emotion cloud linked to his father’s death.

Introducing Beau

Image result for stassi and beau

If I follow Jax and Brittany like hawks on social media, then I follow Stassi and her new man like a stage 5 clinger; my love for them is mad real. I’ve been Team Stassi ever since season one when she was a spoiled, little B. But I go totes hard for her now. I’m so proud of her for maturing and leaving her selfish ways behind in her 20s (I re. late. on another level to this), but one of the biggest changes in her life has been the presence of her new beau, Beau.

On Instagram, I love watching all their European adventures, their blossoming friendships with the entire cast (Stassi and Ariana besties? DREAM COME TRUE!), and Beau has even got Stassi into football. Last week’s episode proved it’s not always aperol spritz and sunshine for the two, but I’m confident nothing can break them up!

James’s (continued) Role as the Villain

Image result for james kennedy

I think James is a good person. There I said it. You can see it through the financial support he provides his family, plus the pure love he has for them. I also think he realizes he has a role to play and that role is the pot stirrer, trouble maker, villain if you will. He’s taken over for Jax. Am I excusing all the horrible things James has said about the cast, especially the females?

Image result for oh hell na gif

But I also have an extremely hard time believing he’s that way deep down as a human being in his daily life; I really do think there is some sort of alcohol dependency, mixed in with a need for some serious counseling.

Listen, I love seeing everyone get along. Believe me, I’d rather have an entire season with no fights because I love this group of people so much and I want them to all be best friends and live happily ever after forever. But come on, that doesn’t make for good TV. The reason VP has become so successful is credited to all the madness these people have gone through together over the past seven seasons. James is here this season to continue said madness (because it doesn’t seem like they’re going to be having it anytime soon with each other).

Finally …

Image result for vanderpump rules season 7

I will not talk poorly about anyone’s mother, so in regards to this week’s episode and Stassi’s mamma drama, I plead the fifth. However, I do have a few thoughts on everything else that took place:

  • As previously mentioned above, Beau and Stassi are the greatest. This episode solidified how Beau could not be more perfect. Don’t believe me? Go listen to her most recent podcast ep as well!
  • I applaud Lala for meeting with James and giving us another chance to see his human side. She said it best about how they need to be two humans who just have hearts and are showing kindness.
  • I had NO IDEA Robby Hayes from the Bachelor World would be on the show, let alone this week! AND come to find out, he’s Adam’s roommate? Scheana girl, what are you doing? No one thought she could look more desperate than last season with Rob, yet here we are!
  • I’m excited to see the girls host the Tuesday GNO at Sur on the next episode. If I remember correctly from social media, it was a pajama party and Billie Lee had some words for them on Twitter. Eager to watch it all unfold!

Image result for vanderpump rules gif season 7

Reunion Madness: RHOC & RHOD

We’ve got a lot to discuss …

B4F57250-68DD-47FC-AD37-187E2385E71A

Monday Night: OC Part 2

  • Two minutes in and my blood is already boiling against Vicki.
  • Oh, a Vicki apology? And now I guess we’re done with the cocaine comment … ?
  • What does David do for money?
  • Next season I want to see Shannon with a nice man!
  • “We shouldn’t show it if you didn’t remember it?”
  • Tamra talking about how Shannon is so reactive …

Image result for gif of tamra judge

Image result for gif of tamra throwing alexis out

Image result for gif of tamra that's my opinion

  • What New York trip are they talking about … ??
  • Shannon does play victim, but I also think Tamra exaggerates.

Next week … looks like the Shannon/Tamra feud continues, and we finally get to hear all thoughts on Shane’s dweeby personality. 

Wednesday Night: Dallas Part 1

  • Hahaha Brandi’s face during that “meditation”
  • I wouldn’t say LeeAnne carries the show, but she does make it VERY entertaining!
  • That was D’Andra’s big secret … ?? Heresay?? So DUMB!
  • I’m so happy to see Cary stick up for Kameron and LeeAnne … honestly I really enjoyed Cary this season (even if it did seem like she played both sides).
  • I. Relate. To. Stephanie. So. Much!! and because of that I just love love love love her.
  • “I don’t need to know who looks at your pussy” BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
  • I so so so so agree with Stephanie that the feud with Brandi and LeeAnne is tit for tat and deep rooted in last season.
  • Andy is so much like a therapist, well, at times …

Image result for andy cohen reunion gif

Image result for andy cohen reunion gif

Image result for andy cohen reunion gif

Next week … looks like Momma Dee will be here (this time choosing to defend D’Andra), we discuss “phone gate” and D’Andra continues to go in on LeeAnne (about Rich!).

In closing…      same dress??

 

RHOC Reunion Part 1: “Low Blow Gunvalson”

“Lies A. Minnelli!!”

Best quote of the night! Or it possibly could have been Kelly calling Vicki a fart (“silent but deadly”)! Overall, part one of the OC Reunion was basically just a Kelly vs. Vicki match, which was super surprising to me because I thought they were all good. Guess not.

Image result for you're like a fart, silent but deadly kelly dodd

Researching their feud a little more after watching last night, Kelly said that she thought the two of them left the reunion on good terms, but watching the promo brought back the emotions for Kelly in regards to Vicki’s hurtful words and accusations. Honestly, I had no idea how serious it was between the two of them, so much so, that Kelly said she wouldn’t return next season unless Vicki was off the show.

Image result for kelly dodd gif

At first, I thought their fight was over Vicki setting Michael up on a date and not telling Kelly, only to then double date with Michael and his female friend (who it turned out was a mutual friend of both Vicki and Kelly!!). Strike one Vicki. Not only did Vicki strike out there during the season, but within the first 10 minutes of last night’s reunion, Vicki had strike two in which she showed her hypocritical side (a very big side of  her) when she said she didn’t want to be a “party girl” anymore, or one who went to out bars all the time, yet got wasted in Mexico at Andales this season (and also partied it up intensely again in Jamaica).

Image result for vicki gunvalson jamaica

Eek!

Strike two ya hypocrite. But honestly, the straw that broke the camel’s back for how absurd Vicki is came when she spouted off that Kelly not only does cocaine, but she’s never with her daughter, only to then backpedal and say that their visitation arrangement is between “you and Michael.”

Image result for kelly dodd and vicki

Image result for kelly dodd and vicki

What was most shocking to me as I watched (and not just because I’m team Kelly) was how nonchalant Vicki was in saying everything. She kept such a straight face and seemed to just blame it on the fact that Kelly called her fat or compared her to a fart. Even Tamra and Shannon couldn’t seem to get through to Vicki that the accusations she was making were intense. But …

Image result for vicki gunvalson jamaica gif

She accused David of beating Shannon, Eddie of being gay, and then there was the Brooks of it all. She ruins relationships and hurts families through her words (& lies) and here she is now doing it to Kelly. Strike three Vic. I really hope she’s not saying these awful things just to secure her spot on the show, but I could totes see that happening now that OGs can be cut (ahem LVP). Ahh, suppose we’ll see how this ends in the next two weeks (it’s a three parter right?) with the continuation of the reunion. But for now … whose side are you on?

Image result for kelly dodd and vicki

Housewives Updates … and Happy 100th post!

Image result for 100 gif

I can not believe my silly little hobby has reached its one hundredth post! I would like to thank my husband for leaving me alone with the upstairs television to watch Bravo (or maybe he leaves me alone because I’m watching Bravo …?), Instagram & Twitter for allowing me to connect with other pop culture fans, as well as trash talk those celebs we don’t particularly like, all my friends who love the same shows I do and gossip about them with me (Mack = Housewives, B = Bachelor, Lyssie = Queer Eye), and anyone who chooses to read what I write or take an interest in it … and for all those who don’t? You’re missing out!

Image result for your loss gif

Obviously, #100 had to be Bravo related because without Bravo, MHH wouldn’t exist … see below for my thoughts on everything Housewife related from this week. Don’t forget to view all 99 past posts by clicking up in the right hand corner. Follow me on IG and Twitter too! Happy reading and here’s to 100 more!

  • OC: I almost had to write up an entire post about psycho Shannon, however, I guess everything worked itself out between her and the ladies in Jamaica because she made up with everyone on last week’s episode. Gina, though, continues to keep that plot line going on tomorrow’s episode, stirring the friendship pot between Shannon & Tamra. Oh! And the reunion was recently filmed; looking forward to that!
  • Dallas: LeeAnne should not, should not, should not have used the word “alcoholic” but I don’t think I can ever be team D’Andra, no matter how in the wrong everyone else is. I also decided that Stephanie is my new housewife QUEEN  —> love love love her! Their reunion films soon too!
  • New Jersey: Season 9 starts this week. I’ve been so disappointed by the past few seasons of NJ, yet Andy says this season brings it all back to like, early season vibes … do we believe him? Guess we’ll find out Wednesday!
  • RHOA: Premiered tonight (yes, it’s on the dvr; will probs watch tomorrow before OC)! Congrats goes out to Kenya who gave birth to her first child … and a second congrats to Kenya because we don’t have to watch her this season! 😀
  • Beverly Hills: These ladies absolutely WON Halloween (Rinna as Erika Jayne?! DEAD!), so I’m very very pumped for them to return to my television, especially because there is going to be some maaaad drama with LVP I think! Pretty sure she won’t shoot with the ladies, or they’re currently not wanting to film with her!
  • Pump Rules: While they are technically not housewives (except for Lala, who I predict will soon transition to RHOB), did you see the trailer for the new season!? ANYONE AS EXCITED AS I AM?!?!?!?! If you missed the trailer, I posted it below. I’m ready to see how the Brittany/Jax proposal went down, see James’s robot girlfriend get shut down by Lala, see where Scheana has been (besides salty on Twitter), and finally see Stassi in a positive relationship (and Beau on my screen!) … oh, and see how things haven’t changed much for “That was so trashy” Kristen.

Hope you all have a wonderful, drama-free week! 

Image result for real housewives gif kiss