I Rewatched Scary Island 🌴👙😈

Recently, Bravo aired season three reruns of The Real Housewives of New York, and I recorded them for a few reasons. First, I knew I would need some shows to watch while hanging out with my new bubba wubba baby boy. Two, as sure as I am that I’ve seen RHONY from the beginning, I can really only recall back to season five (& beyond) with Heather and Kristen and such. Finally, season three brought us Scary Island, and I wanted to analyze the icon that the episode was/is.

I definitely got more than I bargained for!

The early seasons are so crazy to watch because they’re almost 10 years old; the women’s outfits and haircuts (especially Ramona’s!) were so different, and the overall production value was interesting, with the floating gold buildings between scenes.

For more on season 3, click here!

I’ve heard Scary Island referenced everywhere, and I knew most of the quotes & scenes, but watching it in full blew my mind!

Even before the crazy dinner, we got “Turtle Time!” I had no idea it was in the same episode!

Kelly Killorean Bensimon is obviously a Bravo icon, and my earliest memory of her from those past seasons was the running in the streets of New York as a workout. But nothing, I mean nothing I’ve seen of late, on any franchise, could compare to her behavior at that now infamous dinner in the Virgin Islands …

  • (Prior to dinner) she sobbed over the Skinny Girl gift bag Bethenny gave the ladies & called B a “hoebag” …
  • She said she dreamed that Bethenny was going to kill her …
  • She interrupted Ramona’s apology to Bethenny, asking if they were going to make out, only to then tell them to “zip it” …
  • She claimed Alex was channeling the devil when delivering Bethenny’s “message” to Jill …
  • She yelled out, “Al Sharpton!” when Bethenny quoted Jack Nicholson from A Few Good Men (“You can’t handle the truth!”) …
  • And, she just overall made absolutely no freaking sense !!!!

All of which eventually led to ….

I found it very interesting that Kelly wore that purple dress, and the rest were in white or tan, not that I think the purple represented anything, it just made her stand out more alongside her crazy. But seriously, can we get a season with both Kelly and Brandi Glanville, maybe throw in Katie from Potomac too … and we can just watch the insanity fly ???!

The dinner and episode eventually ended with Kelly eating gummy bears and lollipops (?!?!?!?!!!) even though she said she doesn’t eat processed food …

Wow, truly iconic and always to be remembered!

Quotable RHONY: 11×10

The housewives in New York City are out of control and I have the quotes and the countdown to prove it.

Cringest Quotes

1. Luann

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“What, is Bethenny going to go home and watch her daughter sleep? Because, it’s Halloween; it’s 11:00 at night. I mean, isn’t the kid sleeping?”

You. Ungrateful. Peasant. I can’t even with Luann right now! How DARE she say that about Bethenny?! First, you make B come out on a night she even has her daughter with her, second, you don’t come down to see the ladies or invite them up to see you before the show, and last, you don’t start your performance on time! I’m sure I’ll hear something like, “She started 9 minutes late! Bethenny couldn’t stay?” I don’t have children yet, but I’m fairly certain if you have to relieve your babysitter, than you have to go.

I thought the Luann “too big for her britches cabaret star”  story line was just to spruce up the season, but it’s very much true that she’s really feeling herself right now on the show. From not wanting the fish room, to talking shiz about Bethenny in the salon, to this. Get over yourself Countess!

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I suppose her reckoning is coming though, if you watched the mid-season trailer or if you’ve read recently headlines claiming she can’t stay sober. I should probably cut her some slack because she has an uphill climb, but that also doesn’t excuse her insensitive comments so far this season.

2. Tinsley

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“I figure if you’re going to lose it, and be so hysterical and emotional, you might as well do it looking like a clown, with a big bow on your head and like, pink cheeks.”

Yes, Tinsley, we can all see the big bow and the pink cheeks you’re wearing; you don’t have to remind us every episode. And quit acting like you were all embarrassed by your costume; you know you loved it.

Yay you for getting back into society … if getting back into society is having the Big Apple Circus announce your name and give you one line to say. Yay you for being strong and ending things with Scott … if being strong about it is getting drunk and hysterically crying over him. Yay you for having such a strong relationship with your mother … if having a strong relationship is relying on her like a child.

I know I know, I’m going hard on Tinsley too, and I do realize all she wants is a family. But, why does that have to define her? Why can’t she be strong on her own or put herself out there to meet the man of her dreams? Or heck, pull an Andy Cohen and get a baby before you get a man!? My annoyance with Tinsley comes from the fact that I just want to shake her, remind her how great her life is, and tell her to grow the F up!

3. Ramona

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“I have lots of friends, so everyone can’t be invited; I’m sorry!”

As if her social climbing attempts that were caught on film this season haven’t been enough, plus the fact that she wants all these people to throw her birthday parties, Ramona helped create one of the most uncomfortable speeches in housewives’ history. THEN she had the audacity to blame it on Dorinda and Sonja (personally it was all three of their faults, but I like to put the majority of the blame on Ramona).

“Hello! You’re the one who reached me! [wtf does that even mean?!] I’m hosting and I invited you to co-chair, like why are you interrupting my speech? After I talk, then you talk.”

Riiiiight Ramona, because you’re the only one who ever has anything important to say.

4. Dorinda

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“There you go. Important. Important. Don’t ever do that to me again. Don’t ever …”

I don’t necessarily judge Dorinda for her comments this week; she’s said much worse in the past. But, she was a part of that whole speech fiasco and she did interrupt Ramona (which she has a tendency to do), thus she made the list … if only because she contributed to us viewers having to watch part of the episode with one eye shut due to the awkwardness of it all.

However … not everything the women said this week was terrible because the ….

Greatest Quote Goes to

Sonja

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“The best thing that Luann could do right now is do what every other diva does; they just say ‘I didn’t mean to miss you all. I couldn’t find you.’ Don’t be defensive! That’s not the answer! You needed to come over and kiss our rings …… we’re divas too!” 

While she may have been unhinged a few week’s back with the “f***ing Morgan letters!!” Sonja is more and more becoming the voice of reason for all the ladies. Plus, she calls out each of her friends when they are wrong. She stood up for Bethenny when Luann was trying to shame her for leaving the performance early, and she called out Ramona for her birthday party comments, her actions toward Harry, & the entire Birdie/Bridie fiasco. Sonja wins this week for me!

Honorable Mention:
Bethenny

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I realize Bethenny was also in this episode, but mainly it was her running to and from events, so I don’t have any specific quotes to shame or applaud her for. I’m quite sure she had some great comments in her interviews (as she always always does), plus it looks like next week she starts to come for Luann, which I’m ready for, but nothing too memorable this week for me to mention. Well, except for this …

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Thumbs up or down?

RHONY: Part 1 Reunion

A Gift of a Season …” 

Andy said it best; season 10 of the Real Housewives of New York was the gift I never knew I needed. I mean, the couch swap before the reunion even started just shows that this group is nothing but iconic!

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Let’s get into it!

On the “Small Talk”

I do love when Andy goes around and says his welcomes and hellos. Two comments here: a) Dorinda does NOT look good and b) Carole & Adam are definitely something because he put photos of her in lingerie up on his IG story this week. Heaven forbid Carole own up to something though …

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On the Fashion

I can not believe Dorinda’s bubble dress is from this season; does that not feel like forever ago to everyone? Doesn’t it seem like so much has happened since then? Ha! Remember her slurring about Saturday Night Live and how she couldn’t pronounce SNL by the third time she told the story? Too too too good!

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On Everyone Coming for Bethenny

Opportunistic for going to Bobby’s funeral, a liar, has never said a nice word about anyone, doesn’t support other women, bashed people in interviews, killed kittens … oh, wait I don’t think Bethenny was accused of that last one. But seriously, did all the women get together and plot to come for Bethenny? We all know she’s great friends with Andy and that she’s the staple of the New York housewives but how petty can it get?

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First, I guarantee Jill probably wanted the cameras at Bobby’s funeral to not only honor the great man he was, but maybe help propel her back on the show. Second, Ramona has been absolutely terrible to Bethenny, so what does Ramona expect in return? If Luann would have been there, she would have defended Bethenny, which means of course the girls used her absence as ammunition; B was down an ally. If “messy’ is the word from the Potomac reunion, then JEALOUS is the word from New York’s; they’re all jealous of Bethenny’s fame, money, and quick wit!

On Dorinda’s Drinking

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Anyone else feel incredible uncomfortable watching Dorinda laugh after Bravo showed the montage of her many slurred speeches this season? It was also awkward to watch the shade Bravo threw at her about being there to support Lu (the lighting of the candles at the church) to Dorinda’s awful behavior in Colombia (“at least I didn’t get a mugshot”). So much back and forth between those two. I agree with Andy that Dorinda’s drinking has made for funny memes and iconic moments, but it also may be something she needs to focus more attention on, rather than laugh off.

What’s to Come

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  • The elephant in the room that is Luann’s arrest and her being back in rehab
  • Tinsley finally opening her mouth and speaking
  • A recap of The Boat Ride From Hell

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  • Ev. Ery. Thing. that went on at Luann’s show
  • Bethenny v. Carole (finally)
  • Carole v. Andy

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I could not ask for anything more from season 10 of New York. I’ve always said Vanderpump is the best show on Bravo, but RHONY may have taken that spot. With Lu in rehab, Carole gone, Dorinda’s drinking, and everyone against Bethenny, I can only image what next season will bring. But before we get to it, we have more reunion to look forward to!

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Happy Watching!!!

#RHONY: I Can’t Even!

“Everyone knows Bethenny can be a nightmare! So what! She’s your friend!” 

I had planned to wait and blog about the Real Housewives of New York next week … you know, the boat ride we all can’t wait to watch? However, I’m currently six minutes into last night’s episode and I can’t stay quiet any longer!

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The fact that Dorinda and Carole have zero sympathy for Bethenny, when she clearly is going through something is mind boggling to me. For Dorinda to basically say Bethenny has burned all her bridges, that’s why no one is comforting her …. ? WHAT! Bethenny may be Bethenny, but if someone is your friend, and they are clearly hurting, you help them, support them, be there for them! 

Sonja seems to be the only one to care for Bethenny right now and Dorinda is even mocking that! I’m actually really glad Sonja is telling B everything the women have said; she is winning this season for me!

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The OGs

The divide between the ladies could not be more real and seeing Ramona, Sonja, Bethenny, and Luann reminiscing together at lunch is great, great, great! I didn’t know I needed it as much as Bethenny needed it!

Dinner

Let’s just jump right in, shall we? So first, there’s Sonja talking to Bethenny, about Carole asking about Bethenny, while sitting between Carole and Bethenny.

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Oh wait, maybe Sonja is sitting next to Tinsley, not Carole? I’m so confused at this point, I mean Carole is smoking and wearing two feather earrings tonight instead of one, how can I not be confused? One thing that I’m not getting confused about … Dorinda spiraling. Her critiques of Luann in my opinion is not something their relationship can come back from. I wouldn’t forgive her if I was Lu.

Final Thoughts

I am not just Team Bethenny because she needs support with all the shit going on in her life, but because I completely agree with her analysis of Carole. Carole is “too cool for school” and has changed. She’s like that one girl at your job or in a friend group you just can’t connect with because you never feel like you’re good enough by her standards. Honestly, writer girl,  good riddance on your departure from the show after this season!

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As far as Dorinda’s behavior goes, have you ever drank too much and instantly had morning regrets the next day as you were eating a Pedalyte pop? After the Puerto Rico trip with B, how could she do this again? Does she not get insanely embarrassed? I mean, first Luann, then the finger raising comes out at Ramona. Quit throwing stones while living in a glass house Dorinda!

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With Lu going back into rehab and all the news about Demi right now, I’m disgusted with Dorinda’s behavior at dinner. If someone is going to get that upset about a friend making a comment like “Oh here she goes …” when being served another drink, maaaaybe the person drinking has the problem.

In the words of many great housewives, “At the end of the day” we all have our issues, these women just put theirs on television for our entertainment. This week’s RHONY was epic and next week’s is going to be even more so …

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Until then friends … !!! 

Housewife Thoughts & OC Premier

Do your favorites change?

Or are you a ride or die girl for a particular housewife, no matter what she does? I only ask because with Orange County starting, I was curious to see where my feelings lie (lay? I don’t know …).

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This thought initially came to me when I was watching RHONY. I have said for years that Dorinda was my all-time favorite housewife, out of all cities. But I am just not feeling her this season, mainly because of how she’s been treating Sonja and Bethenny.

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Because of that, I am loving the Sonja/Bethenny friendship, which is so strange because Bethenny annihilated Sonja a couple seasons ago. I also was never a big Bethenny fan … yet I could not be more obsessed with the two! The scene where Bethenny was going over Sonja’s dating profile made me LOLOLOLOLOLOL!

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My RHONY world is shaken and my RHONY favorites are changing. Things look like they’re changing in the OC as well; literally the first 20 minutes were spent discussing new homes, new friendships, and new single statuses. After watching the entire episode, I think I’m going to be Team OG, meaning Vicki, Tamra, Shannon, and Kelly, mostly Kelly. I never ever ever ever thought I would like Kelly, but I think I’m going to enjoy watching single Kelly and single Shannon together this year.

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“Read between these lines” no more! 

I never like the new girls anyway, hence why I never really liked Kelly in the past. Tamra’s hiking/lawyer/party planner friend reminds me of a cross between Jeana Keough and Jacqueline Laurita. I’m not really here for her. The core four at the ropes course though,  totes here for it!

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However, we have all season for feelings & favorites to change!

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I guess when it all comes down to it, if you’re a true housewife fan, your likes and dislikes should change every season, heck they could change from episode to episode. I only say this because we learn from the best: THE WOMEN! How wishy-washy are they? How many friendships evolve and change? Take each franchise …

What relationships haven’t broke?

RHOC: Tamra & Shannon?
RHONY: Sonja & Ramona?
RHOBH: Lisa & Kyle?
RHOA: umm…
RHOP: Gizelle & Robyn?
RHOD: Stephanie & Brandi?

Even these friendships have been tested throughout Bravo history. Heck, Teresa’s entire family fell apart! I mean, no relationship is safe if you’re a Housewife, and I think that means we as fans have every right to change favorites and stan someone new each season.

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“Holidazed & Confused” RHONY S10 E9

In this pocket- sized edition of Ra-hony, I want to cover four things…

  • the continuation of the Carole & Bethenny fight
  • Luann’s finding out about Tom (again)
  • Ramona yelling at Bethenny
  • “Next time on the Real Housewives of New York”

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Point 1: Am I the only one confused about this fight? Is it just because Bethenny called Adam an operator? Is it because Carole didn’t support Bethenny with Puerto Rico? Is there something deeper we are missing? OH! What about Carole dragging Luann into it (“You called Luann a loser!”) & Lu and B almost squaring off (which luckily they got over quick) ??? How funny was it though, when Carole and Bethenny started round two as the girls were partying downstairs LOL LOL LOL LOL !!!! And after all of it, I think they made up in the end? Does anyone know for sure? Oh well, B liked my tweet (see below), so I’m team Bethenny all the way!

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Point 2: “And he has some busted up, banged up girlfriend!” This whole scene could not have been better: the “keep quiet” head shake by Ramona, Bethenny’s use of the the terms ‘girl code’ & ‘uncool,’ and the ending with Lu calling him a dick, exclamation point … PRICELESS! What makes it even crazier is we all know this leads to what happens in Palm Springs over Christmas Eve, as Luann discussed taking her soon to be infamous trip.

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Point 3: First off, WHY IS HER DOG IN THE STREET? Maybe that wasn’t the first thing you noticed, perhaps instead it was Ramona answering, “This is Ramona” like, do you not have Bethenny saved in your phone? Per their conversation, Ramona totally enjoys when other people argue! (umm, who threw out the word “puppet” in regards to the Bethenny/Carole fight??) Ramona also immediately ran to Carole at the blood drive, spewing that Bethenny thinks Carole’s lonely & sad … but lastly, what might be most noteworthy here is the iconic Ra. mon. uh. yell. ing. at. some. one. sound. ing. like. a. type. write. rrrr. mom. ment! (Head tilt, head tilt, head tilt). “Oh. my. gosh. Beth. enny! You. do. not. su. pport. other. women!”

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Point 4: Thinking the episode was over, I looked forward to watching the “next time” moment, but quickly learned I was not ready;  I was left SHOOK!!! THE MOMENT HAS COME FOR LUANN’S ARREST AND BRAVO PLAYED A NEVER BEFORE SCENE PORTION OF THE FREAKING POLICE VIDEO ON THE NEXT TIME SEQUENCE!! THEN, the news footage was played, where you can clearly see she’s wasted; did you know the judge told her to stop drinking and to get a lawyer ? I didn’t. THEN, all the girls were gossiping gossiping gossiping. Next week’s episode is going to be TELEVISION CHANGING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Pit inducing!

RHONY is the gift that keeps on giving and has been the best franchise for a while now. If you disagree, @ me! No really! Please follow me on Twitter @myhollywoodh & Instagram at myhollywoodhangover !!!!

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RHONY Reunion Recap: It’s (mostly) about Tom.

I also have so many questions…

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Much like my Southern Charm Reunion posts, I have a few questions for the ladies of NYC based off Wednesday’s part one reunion. Like, do you all say Ra-hon-ie like we do? Or, seriously Andy why DO you always come for Bethenny regarding Jill Zarin? Speaking of B, where can I get the “Get off my jock” shirt that’s in your Twitter banner?

Okay, maybe those aren’t the most important questions to ask, so…

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Ramona:

How did it feel to have the girls come for you right out of the gate? Do you really agree that you acted like a shitty person this year? Or, was that whole “I don’t know why I act this way; I wouldn’t be friends with that person” just an act? I mean Bethenny literally called you a horror show; are you?! I mean, your face was in Mexico, but are you a horror show of a person? Speaking of your Mexico face,  how did you show yourself again after that monstrosity? Lastly, is the guy you spoke about on the reunion still with you after your ugly behavior (and face) this season?

Sonja:

Girl, are you truly, finally over Dorinda not inviting you to the Berkshires? I understand you have a hard time letting go (#i’vehadloversforyears), but seeing how you got along with Dorinda towards the end of the season, I really think it’s time to put the Berks to bed! Also, how did you feel when Dorinda came for you those first few episodes; it couldn’t have felt good. While appearing to be cool as a cucumber about all of it (and fingers crossed to really being over the Berkshires), were you that cool about the press? Come on, you can tell us! On a scale of dry mouth to lost in the desert, how thirsty were/are you for Page Six to write about you?sonja

Dorinda:

WHERE DID YOU GET THAT BUTTERFLY DRESS? Loving loving loving it! I already asked Ramona about her bad behavior, but I must ask you now: how excited were you for Andy to bring up the fact that Ramona defaced your house? I don’t feel this got the attention (via show or reunion) it deserved. I also already asked Sonja about her hurt Berkshire feelings, but I must ask you now: are you two finally in a good place? I mean I’m down for you to come for her again because it’s so entertaining, but I also would love for my two favorites to be in a good place.

Carole:

Love ya, but why are you even there?

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Tinsley:

I have one question and one question only. Da f*** with that dress?!

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Bethenny:

I already covered it with her up above, but do you regret calling Ramona a horror show? Was it a bit harsh…? Also, when you cried to Lu earlier in the season, I mean, did you ever get your “I told you so” moment or does asking that cross the line? Lastly, is the common man able to book a trip to Tequila, Mexico or is that just a Skinnygirl thing (because I am SO DOWN to travel there!) ?

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(Okay honestly, once I came across this picture there was NO WAY I was going to post something else!)

Luann:

Obviously the first question I have to ask is how hard was filming this knowing your marriage was falling apart (literally filing for divorce three weeks later; thanks black screen prior to starting the show)? Are the women treating you different or is everyone saying “I told you so?” I mean, Bethenny CRIED to you, basically pleading with you not to marry Tom, yet you did? Have you apologized to her? In reality, she was trying to save you from all of this….? #thinkaboutit

I’m really shocked Tom got brought up so early in the reunion; was he brought up this early in filming it as well? I also don’t have words finding out it was Tom’s first marriage! Knowing everything you knew prior, did you really think you would be able to change him? Really, truly? Or, were you just blinded by love? I don’t find you to be that naive, Lu.  How are your children handling everything? Even with all my harsh questions, I really do wish the best for you Lu! As all the bloggers, tweeters, podcasters, and fans of the show have said, WE ARE READY FOR SINGLE LU!!

 

Hopefully next week will answer my questions rather than leave me with more.

The one thing that I have zero question about is that RHONY is my absolute favorite franchise! 

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Clip! Clip! Clip! RHONY Recap: 9×13

“Is this what you meant by gangster lunch?”

Ya’ll this entire post is dedicated to Dorinda Medley. I was going to end the post promoting her new line of products, but hell, she was so amazing last night I’m starting with it.

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You can purchase coffee mugs, tshirts, phone cases, & more with exclusive Dorinda quotes including, but not limited to…

“I cooked, I decorated, I made it nice.”
“I’ll tell you how I’m doing, not well bitch!”

and my all time favorite…

“What are you doing here without Dorinda?”

which I do own a shirt of (except it’s a Society 6 version; shoutout to T. Kyle!)

Okay. Now onto the episode. Bethenny invited the girls to a lunch in the Bronx and by each of their comments, not many of them have traveled to the Bronx. Ahem, except my girl Dorinda, WHO SHOWS UP HUNGOVER, or possibly still drunk.

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Dorinda decides to keep drinking and as Carole put it, “When Dorinda is bad, she’s so good.” Bethenny, Dorinda, & Carole are joined by Tinsley, Luann, and Sonja. I’m not even sure how the conversation came up (honestly because we’re “not about going backward asswipe!”) but Sonja mentions that Dorinda was either interested in being part of or contacted about doing Sonja’s Tipsy Girl line. This is what set Dorinda off because she was claiming that was never true (and honestly I don’t ever remember this being brought up – #teamdorinda).

So, the two get into a shouting match where we get amazing Dorinda one-liners such as “Back that shit up!” “Hostess with the moooostest!” and the now famous “Clip! Clip! Clip! you fool!” which is apparently another way to say shut the f*** up! Gah, I am so going to start using it.

After Dorinda tells Sonja to go retrieve her coat from the coat check and then does the hip swirl “hostess with the mostest” line, the lunch seems to end. AND WE’RE ONLY ABOUT, what, SEVEN MINUTES IN!

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Let’s see…what else? Tinsley goes to see her therapist to discuss the death of her dad and then the nightmares she’s having from her arrest and last relationship. No disrespect Tinsley girl, but do you only have one story line? GET OVER IT! Over her.

Sonja, Ramona, & Luann have a lunch where they discuss an upcoming girls’ trip to Vermont, where Ramona lamely states, “I only ski Aspen”

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Sonja also makes a comment to Lu about having sex with the same man (Tom). Lu gets pissed (same story, different day with those two) & leaves the table. Cut to Vermont …

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Bethenny, Carole, & Dorinda arrive first. Uhhhh and Queen Dorinda strikes AGAIN when she forgets all her luggage because she went to say goodbye to John, ended up having sex with him, and then drove to Vermont forgetting to pick up her luggage Yet, she managed to bring a miniature disco light!

Soon after, Ramona, Sonja, & Luann arrive. Luann is upset she didn’t get a better room because she just got married and people should be considerate of that? I can’t even begin to understand how that correlates but whatevs. (Honestly, these bitches are so annoying regarding rooms on vacation because I’d kill to stay in a place even half as nice as these girls).  There is also a funny scene with Sonja getting Ramona water and pretending it’s fresh mountain water, when it was really tap. Just watch it.  And, lastly, Tinsley again complains about her arrest and past, failed relationship!

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Oh man, this episode was so so so great. And, we still have the Mexico trip ahead of us! I can’t wait!