The Bachelor Finale & Thoughts on Hannah B.

How did we go from this …

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to this?Image result for bachelor finale  Image result for bachelor finale

Honestly, I don’t really care how it all went down; I’m just glad it’s over. I’m thrilled we don’t have to see Colton whine or discuss his virginity anymore; like, I’m so done with his season … and to me (unpopular opinion coming), it could not have ended worse.

First, let me say I didn’t even watch part one of the two part finale; we were in Dallas, TX for a Spring Break/”Babymoon” living the good life, searching for Dallas Housewives and attending Maverick basketball games. However, the hubs did get us home in time on Tuesday for the final final episode.

I didn’t go back and watch Monday’s show because I already knew what I missed. Bye Tayshia. Bye Hannah G. Go find Cassie.

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Although I am a little sad I missed Chris Harrison telling Colton “maybe she’s just not that into you.”

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However, Colton is not JGL, nooo, there is something he can do about it! He can go after his girl and basically stalk her until she commits to at least some sort of something with him. Thus leading to a very boring Tuesday night episode, where we already knew who the winner was going to be. We were just watching Colton and Cassie, what, date like regular people?

I guess there was the shock on Cassie’s face that he sent the other girls home, more begging from Colton, Cassie meeting his parents (who did not seem impressed) and their fantasy suite date (“Did they or didn’t they? Did they or didn’t they? Did they or didn’t they?”).

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It really seemed like she still may not fully go through with this, them being a couple and all. Was she only on the show originally to gain some IG fame, but got blindsided when Colton actually liked, excused me, loved her? Girl, what show did you think you were on? Her back and forth, wishy-washy attitude, combined with his pussy-ass begging, “don’t ever leave me” self was too much for me to handle, thus my pleasure that it’s finally over.

But look, I can’t always be so cynical; maybe it was the Air Supply song that really got to me, but in the end (thank goodness it’s the end) I’m happy for a happy couple. While they seem beyond annoying, and all of Colton’s current posts about her feel as if he’s never been in a true relationship …

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I applaud them for doing what we all want Bachelor couples to do … actually be in a real relationship, like us normal folk do when you’ve only know someone a few months. The pressure of an engagement on this show (and heaven forbid a wedding!) is too much, so props to them for sticking to what average humans do. And I wish them well, despite what you’ve read here or despite what I may say in the future, I really do hope it all works out!

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The Most Awkward Bachelorette in History??

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Okay look, I know everyone is like “Give her some PR and speech classes!” and “If she’s a pageant girl, shouldn’t she be able to talk?” But COME ON GUYS, like you could do better? I am here for Hannah Brown and all her awkward, beast mode, mispronounced words beauty.

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I love how authentic and true she is, and I think going through Colton’s season really humbled her, both with the Caelynn drama and getting her heart broken. Plus her guys’ photos (those to be on this season) were released earlier in the week, and while they all look terrible, don’t most Bach pictures look terrible in the beginning? I’m sure we’ll have some fiiiiine men when it all plays out.

I was a huge Hannah B. stan from the beginning, and while I feel justice needs to be served for the other Hannah (who didn’t even get a fantasy suite date!), I’m so so so looking forward to watching the next season of The Bachelorette … which is saying a lot, as this show can get too much for me most times.

Come find me on social media …

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to discuss all things Bachelor Nation!! I love making new friends! Until next time!

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“She Just Set You All Up” #RHOBH Recap

“Grief is a process nobody teaches you …” 

I’m trying really hard to have that be the theme of my post today, but all I can keep thinking is …

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Before we get into the Lucy Lucy Apple Juice (wtf) of it all, let’s start at the beginning of Season 9. It opened with a horrendous fight between Kyle and Lisa (and Ken). Honestly, I hate when Bravo does this because it lasts less than a minute, then switches to what, two months prior and Teddi’s new home? Ugh. Just start from Teddi’s house; why get me all worked up and excited for a blow up in the first place, to then take it away from me before it’s over?

I had originally planned to blog the premier episode, but I thought it was overrated and I walked away annoyed. I was annoyed by the Erika/Dorit friendship, I was annoyed watching Rinna work out with her daughters (and goats), I was annoyed Kyle was starting the same fight with Lisa from last year (“You like Dorit more than me”), and I was annoyed that LVP got any personal airtime because she basically has two shows and that’s beyond frustrating for me.

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Oh, and to top it all off, I am so not here for Denise Richards. Liiiike, what makes you cool enough to be the new housewife, marrying Charlie Sheen? Teddi saying, “#Hashtag Winning” to remind us all of it (as if the ladies don’t discuss it enough) was stupid, and to top it all off Richards can’t even dress correctly to roll with this group. Teddi is the hippie with the laid back style, remember? We don’t need Denise. UGH and if Rinna says one more thing about how she was an actress or how she knew so and so or was friends with so and so …

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Things are looking up though, which just goes to show you should never judge a housewives’ season based off the premier! While episode two was also a bit boring, in real life it brought us a Twitter feud we didn’t know we needed between Rinna, Harry Hamlin, and Nicolette Sheridan.

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Apparently, (which Rinna blabbed on the show) Nicolette Sheridan was married to Harry, went to a Michael Bolton concert one night, and that was the end of their marriage. Sheridan went to Twitter to say that wasn’t true.

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As Lisa was telling the story, the other women were all …

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yet Rinna was all …

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“Cheers to Michael Bolton”

Anything to stay relevant is Rinna’s way. Moving right along … let’s get to the Bahamas!

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To recover from her robbery, (anyone else not know she was robbed?) Dorit planned an early in the season trip for the women. If you follow my posts, you know I love me a good housewives’ trip and this one was no exception. Finally, the ladies came to provide some entertainment and many of my thoughts from the first episode shifted: Dorit isn’t that bad, the show is clearly not overrated, and LVP may still deserve sympathy for her brother’s death, but this season she is messy as hell.

I thought the Dog Gate of Season 9 was over and done with, but is any issue ever really solved with these ladies? It was so obvious LVP was pissed at Dorit because she could not stop making digs at her. I counted five during this episode (Not to mention how utterly ridiculous LVP was to Erika regarding the sympathy note … I can’t and I shan’t! #toaster … but for real, I’m not even getting into that because it was insanely dumb).

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I find it so so so SO hard to believe that Rinna didn’t know about the dog drama, but once she did know, man did she tell all she knew: “Guess who came to the table to play?”

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Once that dinner started, it couldn’t be stopped. I loved how Denise had no idea what was going on and Camille did her best to explain. I could go into it all, but I think the ladies said it best:

I had nothing to do with any of it.”

                              “It wouldn’t be out there if you didn’t want it out there.”

“She’s acting like she’s so confused why Dorit’s upset.”

                              “I would love to say I’m shocked, but I’m not.”

“I love Lisa, but that doesn’t mean I’m blind.”

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Again, I want to have sympathy for LVP because she’s going through an extremely hard time and as Rinana did say, we don’t really learn a proper way to grieve. But, at the end of the day … this was a set up. Guess we’ll find out more next week!

 

35 Thoughts During the 91st Academy Awards

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The day we all have been waiting for finally arrived!!

No host? No problem! I’m here to give you a play by play of what went down, what will be talked about, and what I thought of it all!

  • JT’s opening of the Oscars was way better.

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  • A movie montage gets me every time! I’ll take one over a host; I forgot how many fantastic movies came out this year!
  • Having Maya, Tina, and Amy open the show is the smartest move ever!
  • “God is good all the time!” Congrats Regina! (I wasn’t really pulling for anyone here, so yay her!).
  • Obviously Vice deserves to win for Makeup and Hairstyling! Christian Bale was UNRECOGNIZABLE!
  • Sam Rockwell’s face at Melissa McCarthy’s presenting is me … although the bunnies are funny.
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Not the exact face from the show … but you get the idea.

  • Forty minutes in and I’m bored … can you give me a performance or another montage or something?
  • Is Roma going to win everything tonight? I don’t want to watch it and only will if it wins Best Picture.
  • “If you ever want to borrow the dragons, ring me!” XOXO Emilia Clarke!
  • Love Jennifer Hudson; hated the performance.

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  • Crying all over again hearing “I’ll Never Love Again.”

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  • Bohemian Rhapsody wins for sound editing and sound mixing; too obvious that a film about music would win all the sound awards?
  • Wait a minute! Roma is nominated for Best Foreign Language AND Best Picture?? Can you do that? Someone less lazy than me research this.
  • Is Bette Midler in Mary Poppins Returns? I’m not upset to see her; just curious as to why she’s singing this song.Image result for bette midler singing oscars 2019
  • The songs seem to be getting cut short; Bradley and Gaga BETTER NOT get cut off.
  • CONGRATS MAHERSHALA! I am OBSESSED with him! I loved Green Book and I love the current season of True Detective, but I don’t think I would have enjoyed them as much as I did if not for Mahershala Ali. Then he goes and dedicates his award to his grandmother, thanks his wife and daughter?? HE IS THE BEST!!!
  • I don’t really care that a Spiderman movie won, but I did hear many kids loved it, so cool.
  • The Ballad of Buster Scruggs, which this country couuuuuntrrrrry song is from, was surprisingly entertaining. Sad, but entertaining. Try it out one night.
  • I’ve never seen Wayne’s World; am I a pop culture failure?

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  • Cue the Awkwaina and John Mulaney for host next year tweets! So funny! “They gave us one of the big ones!”
  • “I can’t believe a film about ministration just won an Oscar!” Do I need to watch??
  • First Man wins for visual effects; too obvious that a film about space would win the visual award?
  • NO INTRODUCTION NEEDED FOR THIS!!!
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LITERALLY EV-ERY-THINGGGGG!!

  • Wow. I’m shocked to see Green Book win for Best Screenplay, only because there was so much controversy around the story. BUT, I loved the movie and I think it’s so awesome the main character’s real life son wrote it, and now won an Oscar for it!
  • Wow! Congrats Spike Lee on your first Academy Award!
  • I play different movie scores while my students do independent work. Some of my favorites to hear include Forrest Gump & La La Land. The students get so excited when the Star Wars score comes on. The presenters were exactly right; a certain movie score takes you to a particular feeling you had when watching a film.
  • Gaga on her way to an EGOT!
  • Also I had no idea about her necklace! It’s Over 100 carrots and Audrey Hepburn has been the only other star to wear it. QUEEN! (Fact check this, though)
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  • If you’ve seen A Star is Born than you know Bradley Cooper deserved Best Actor more than any others nominated … but congrats Rami Malek anyway (sigh).
  • Oh gosh I didn’t realize Rami is dating his costar from Bohemian Rhapsody !!! I had no idea that was her!
  • Yay Olivia Colman, I guess? I wanted Gaga, but figured Glen Close would win, so meh, whatever.
  • Okay, I take it back. Colman just provided us with one of those great Oscar moments with her speech; a rare occasion when an actor proves to be a actual person with real emotions.
  • JULIAAAAA! That pink!! I’m deceased!
  • In a shocking turn of events …. Green Book wins! Now we don’t have to watch Roma.Image result for green book gif

In closing this award season, I realized nothing makes me happier than sitting with my husband, cuddling with my puppies, and watching a good ass movie. I love a well told story & I love when a film brings people together. Regardless of the snobbery and stuffiness of Hollywood, I will always appreciate the Academy Awards for celebrating each year of great films.

New Jersey Reunion: Round 1

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Jackie, Melissa, Margaret

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Teresa, Dolores, Jennifer

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Who will come out on top?

Teresa

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I was suuuuuper shocked that the first question right out of the gate was to Tre about Joe being deported. However, in classic Andy fashion, he told us we’d get into it all later, aka part three of the reunion.

What we didn’t have to wait for was Teresa going after Jackie. Teresa definitely made her point that Jackie wasn’t allowed to come for her because if you’re not with Teresa, (or “on the Teresa show”) then you’re against her. Tre drove this home be saying something about looking around the room, noticing that anyone who ever attacked Teresa was gone and off the show.

Margaret

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looked amazing, absolutely amazing! Her face, shoes, dress, earrings, EVERYTHING was “on point.”  Plus when going up against Jennifer (again), Margaret handed herself well. Girl earned her seat next to Andy.

Melissa

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can never do anything right, yet I agree with Jackie that Melissa has become the number one girl in this group (referring to when Jackie called her the Carrie). I think some of the other women can’t handle this … or maybe just one woman. I couldn’t believe Teresa said Melissa needed to be on the other couch, in referencing alliances. No longer am I confused about why Melissa is in so much trouble with Teresa at the reunion. Melissa didn’t agree with Tre on certain issues this season and in the end, it’s looking as if Melissa sided with those “against Teresa.”

Also, did Melissa call Teresa irrational??

Jennifer

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After hating Jennifer in the beginning of the season, to growing to like her by the finale, she was able to make me go back to hating her in just the first ten minutes of the reunion. She sounded so dumb talking about Oklahoma. Just because you’re a city person doesn’t mean you can hate hate hate on how or where others live. We already went through this already with Vicki Gunvalson.

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Speaking of hate, or maybe more of a dislike, I was shocked that Margaret v. Jennifer would be brought up so soon.  After reaching what I thought was a reasonable bit of closure to their disagreements during the season, at the reunion Jennifer went and called Marge Senior a “homewrecker.” Damn girl, say whatever you want about Margaret, but it’s an extremely low blow when you go insulting someone’s mother. Perhaps it even shows the kind of person you are …

Jackie

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“Took on Teresa and lived to tell about it.”

I will admit that after the picture of Jackie at Teresa’s book signing came out, it was hard for me to look at her the same way I had since the start of the season. I really liked Jackie from day one, but that picture made my thoughts shift to her having a possible agenda being on the show, a “I want to be famous” agenda. But stalker (??) I’m not so sure. Then again, maybe Jackie wants to be forever known as the one who took Teresa down … ???

Dolores

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I COMPLETELY forgot that Andy was the one to spill the beans to Dolores about Frank being disbarred. However, I ship Frelores hardcore. Based off what she said on the reunion though, she seems pretty serious about her boyfriend, David. Buuuut, I predict that on the next season Frank will be around just as often as he’s always been. 

Still to come

I’ll be back to recap once parts two & three have aired. I’m looking forward to hearing Joe’s thoughts on the Melissa/Teresa feud, plus the Danielle of it all! Until next time, don’t lose your mind, don’t flip any tables, and keep your lip liner tight like a baboon!

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“No Children, No Parents, No Husbands” — We Gotta Talk About Jersey!

Tequila, monkeys’ assholes, & broken glasses

Jersey is BACK! After many seasons of snoozeville, The Real Housewives of New Jersey has returned with the heat … and I’m not just talking about the weather in Mexico.

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Let’s begin with that first dinner in Cabo… 

I think it all starts with Jennifer drinking. Listen, do I blame her for getting white girl wasted in Mexico? Hell to the no … we’ve all been there. I gave myself a black eye once in Mexico when I slipped and my face broke my fall. However, Jennifer calling Teresa’s gift ugly (drunk or not) was inappropriate and rude.

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I also find it interesting that Margaret can say whatever she wants in response, fully sober, and yet for me, she’s never wrong. The obvious housewife response to Jennifer’s necklace attack is a returned below the belt comment. The Marg did what the show asks of her with the whole lip liner looks like a monkey’s asshole comment.

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And while I may be Team Margaret (& probably always will be), Jennifer’s response of “Yeah, a monkey’s asshole, that you f***ing sucked, probably!” will forever go down in housewives history along with

  • “Get off my jock”
  • “Who gon’ check me boo?”
  • “Jesus jugs”

and “Prostitution whore!” You can watch the women’s reaction to the whole argument here.

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Honestly, thank you ladies. It was amazing television.

But wait, we aren’t done …

The sun did come out eventually and tempers cooled off, yet, round two was coming. While the ladies did enjoy some pool and shopping time (who takes their Chanel bag out on the streets of Mexico?), at the second dinner (was it really only the second dinner?), Marg and Jennifer were back out at it again. I don’t even remember how it all got brought up, but in true housewife fashion, past comments never really die. The conversation turned to the remarks Jennifer had made about Margaret’s mother cheating with a married man, as Margaret did herself. The Marg fired back with comments about Jennifer’s husband sleeping in the pool house and having a girlfriend.

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Relive that here.

Anyone who thought Margaret was a terrible human for the comments she made at this dinner is so wrong because The Marg immediately apologized when Jennifer returned to the table (what, less than 10 minutes after making the mean comments), and told Jennifer she said them just to hurt her and there was no truth in the comments. This is honestly huge because apologies in the housewives’ world can take weeks, months, and even years to produce. Margaret admitted right away she was wrong.

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While it seemed the dust was finally settling in Cabo, a hurricane called Danielle Staub was brewing, and broken glass, threats, & fueled tempers would be left in her wake.

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If you haven’t caught on yet this season, please realize in New Jersey, you do not mention children, parents, or husbands in an argument. Danielle is so slimy, of course she brings up Margaret’s children (& even her grandchildren) in an argument that I’m not even sure where it started in the first place. (Can’t these ladies have one nice dinner on vacation?). Margaret being the queen of the trip she is, took Delores’s wine (because why waste her own drink) and threw it at Danielle. My favorite part of this whole scene was by the time everyone stood up and Danielle was ready to retaliate, Margaret was already walking up the stair, sashaying in that green dress of hers.

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“Had Danielle talked about my children, she’d have no teeth left.”

“Teresa, this one [points to Danielle] has you going in f***ing circles.”

The drama didn’t stop there because Melissa then got upset that someone broke or threw a glass at her (while she was pointing fingers at Danielle and Jennifer). This led to crazy-eyed Jennifer to break another glass, hold a shard of it at Melissa, and say something along the lines of “if I threw a glass at you, you’d know”

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Yeah … that man in the scene? That’s security.

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Who’s exhausted at this point and just wants to fly home to Jersey? On this week’s episode the girls did just that, and even appeared to eventually all make up: Teresa and Melissa, Teresa and Margaret, Jennifer and Dolores, Jennifer and Melissa. But where was Danielle?

The Danielle of It All …

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This shady bitch (in my opinion) is the sole cause of many arguments this season. You can “boo hoo” all you want about how horrible she was treated on social media regarding her behavior on the show, but honey, you signed up for all this.

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First, her treatment of Margaret and all the women at her wedding was absolutely atrocious. While she did apologize for it on WWHL with Andy, still not okay. After her wedding, she was still twisting words to show Margaret in a terrible light with the other ladies. And finally, at the explosive, glass shattering dinner in Mexico, Danielle was the one to bring up the Marg/Jennifer fight (which had already been squashed), and then wouldn’t let the conflict go by taking it to another level discussing Margaret’s kids.

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I have nothing even left to say about Snobielle Stupid Staub; we’ll let her run her mouth at the reunion. Speaking of the reunion, it sounds like it’s set to be explosive, AND it’s sooner than you think because next week is the RHONJ season finale.

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Overall, this season has redeemed New Jersey as queens in the housewives’ universe and I can not freaking wait for the next coming weeks as we wrap up it all up!

 

Atlanta Takes Tokyo

and Marlo loses her bag …

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If my favorite thing about watching Housewives is the reunions, then my second favorite has to be cast trips. The ladies of Atlanta are currently (well currently on the show) visiting Tokyo, Japan.

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The looks have been on point, the antics have made me laugh, and the drama has been reeeeal!

“She gonna murder one of us tonight; I can feel it”

Eva vs. Everything

Sweet, hippie Eva can’t seem to catch a break this trip. First, she gets into it with Porsha regarding the shady comments Eva’s been making all season. What I took from Porsha was that Eva needs to just own when she’s been shady, because as Nene was saying, if you’re going to throw shade in this group of women, “someone will call you out” on it.

However, Eva owned it all when she went up against Marlo, which honestly has been a long time coming this season between these two

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I was proud of Eva for standing her ground against Marlo, plus Eva needed a win after receiving the horrible news regarding her grandfather. We need to keep Eva in all our prayers because re-watching and reliving it back now for her probably really sucks.

Nene

I think this trip is showing Nene in one of her most honest lights. By that I mean, Greg’s health is breaking her down, and the Tokyo trip is her breaking point. First, there was her argument with Tanya, where I kind of saw both sides. I thought Nene’s comment about “marrying someone else” at the temple could’ve been taken as rude. I also think the reason Nene stormed out of the sushi restaurant was because she couldn’t really defend her comment; it was ill-mannered. At the same time Tanya girl, get thicker skin. But, maybe Nene left because she was tired and just over it all. She made a comment and didn’t mean anything serious by it, or that’s how she defended it. For once, with this “feud” I saw all sides, mostly because a) I’m (overly) sensitive like Tanya, but b) I know Nene can say whatever she wants to people regardless of consequences. If this disagreement tells us anything, it’s that Tanya may not be cut out to be a housewife and Nene (as mentioned) is breaking, if not already broken.

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Speaking of Nene, she got left! Porsha’s comment about her murdering someone could not have been more real; I was terrified for that sweet tour guide, who not only had to endure the back and forth between Eva and Marlo, but basically had to babysit these women the entire trip, telling them to be quiet and to be on time. WHICH, I just can not get over that the ladies had the audacity to be 30-45 minutes late the first day, after specifically being told the night before to be on time. In the end, sweet tour guide didn’t come to play when she finally left Nene.

Final Thoughts & Next Week

Closing, I loved how Porsha announced her pregnancy and I’m excited to see her journey the rest of the season. I totally related to Kandi regarding food on the trip; I’ve traveled to China before and like Kandi, I do not have an exotic pallet. Lastly, how great was the Xscape karaoke moment between all the women? I loved that they were bonding, getting along, and singing Kandi’s song!  

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Next week Tokyo continues for the ladies and looks to include strippers, samurai, probably more sushi, a breakdown from Nene, and a spilled secret from Kandi about Dennis.

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One Thing Before We Go …

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THIS. WAS. THE. MOST. EPIC. EVENT. I. NEVER. THOUGHT. COULD. HAPPEN. AND. DIDN’T. KNOW. I. NEEDED. TO. HAPPEN!!!

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From Rinna screaming at all of them to dance, to Kyle’s dirty suit at the end of the night, to the overall amazing and beautiful guestlist. It was just a magical adult version of a fairy tale and solidified, SOLIDIFIED my Housewife love!

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Battle of the Beauty Queens — Bachelor Recap

“I feel like I’m in a Bachelor tornado …” 

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What I mean by that is … the show has been coming at me fast and I haven’t had time to really process it. I don’t know any of the girls’ names, I barely watch the show live or live tweet, and I have yet to decide how I feel about Colton. It’s moving too quickly to absorb … and plus, I find myself just not caring. I’d rather watch reruns of Vanderpump than a new episode of Bach.

BUT!!

I’m committed to you all and I know you’re waiting to hear my thoughts on Colton’s season!

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Colton as the Bachelor

I struggle with Colton because of his past with the show. It seems too convenient that he would go from meeting/hooking up with Tia, to being on Becca’s season, to Paradise back with Tia, to finally dump her in the end and become the next Bachelor (see: Colton is the Worst).

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I’m going to try really hard to not let those feelings bleed into his season, so I paid extra attention to Colton on this week’s episode to see if my feelings about him changed. Here is what I came up with:

  • He is insanely easy to read. You can tell which girls he really likes versus the girls the producers are telling him to  keep around.
  • He also just tells the girls, “I like you” so maybe that’s why he’s easy to read??
  • He’s emotional; I can’t tell if it’s the good amount in a partner or the whiny amount that would annoy me.
  • Yes, Colton works with kids and is a human teddy bear around them, but my cynical side thinks it’s another way for him to promote himself … I know I know, that makes me sound like a terrible person, but in the safe space of my computer I’m not afraid to admit it.
  •  I think Colton needs an older woman, not just because I love Elyse so much (see below) … but I like what she brings out in Colton. I like him with her … and that’s my first time (ever) saying I like him.

The Girls

My initial favorite was Miss Alabama Hannah, until that treacherous one-on-one from last week where girlfriend couldn’t even muster up a toast. Aren’t you a pageant girl? Can’t you make up some BS on a dime? Then this week she discussed Caelynn with Colton, and you just don’t talk about other girls with the main dude. Ever. While so much of this show is edit by edit, pieced together to create either a story line or drama, I truly don’t think Hannah has been edited that often; I think she’s really as insecure, not poised, and crazy as she appears. Guess I now have to pick a new favorite. Sighhh.

As far as any in the running for my new fav, I like the other Hannah, who also happens to be from Alabama? She got the first impression rose, and while I would like to say comes across genuine, I’ve clearly been burned by one Alabamahannah this season and we’re only three episodes in. So who knows.

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As mentioned, I la la la love Elyse! I would actually like to see her as the next Bachelorette, with guys in their late 20s – 30s vying for her … less douche canoes. I mean, if she doesn’t end up with Colton, because as said, I kind of like them together. However, nothing I want ever happens on this show, so moving right along.

For all holy entertainment purposes, I hope he KEEPS DEMI FOREVER!! “I don’t want to be another one of those yo ho ho’s …”

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I don’t think I’ll ever love Demi in the way that I loved Jordan (despite his ridiculous ways). I also don’t think I will ever root for Colton to propose to her, especially when she’s up against girls I like, buuuuut she’s so funny and entertaining, she can stay for a while longer.

I don’t know who all annoys me. Maybe Tracy? Is that her name? The one who Demi keeps antagonizing, and who claims to be a stylist, even though she can’t even dress herself.  I struggle with liking Onyeka too. Obviously I’m down for a big personality, and while I loved the “drowning in bitches” comment, she’s just too too much and annoying AF.

This Season

I usually like the craziness and cat fights in the early episodes, but for some reason, this time around, I’m ready to get down to like, the final five. I’m curious to see what Colton’s really looking for and how the finalists will interact with one another when it’s the end of the line (and what their families are like too!). Guess we’ll find out soon enough!

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Who’s Watching this Season of VPR?

Who am I kidding? What a dumb question! Of course we all are watching the newest season of the best show on Bravo: Vanderpump Rules. With only a few episodes in, drama has already ensured, but  first, “let’s gooo back … back to the beginning.”

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“I feel comfortable using Hilary Duff lyrics in everyday life”

Jax and Brittany’s Engagement

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After finding out this summer, or whenever, they got engaged via social media, I could not WAIT to see it happen on the show. I genuinely genuinely believe Jax was nervous in the moment and that nothing was staged or faked. Since the engagement, I have been a strong follower of these two, mainly to watch Jax’s every move. It’s not that I’m suspecting him to ruin this current good thing with Britt, but we’re all a tad cautious he may screw something up, right? However, I get no greater joy than seeing them as a happy couple. Since their engagement, they’ve been traveling everywhere (mainly with Lala and Randall; and btw, who else lives for the Jax and Randall bromance??), plus Jax and Britt are seriously wedding planning (Kentucky castle, hello!).

I plan on enjoying the rest of the season with them in a joyous bliss, so Tom Sandoval can step off for thinking this isn’t true love, but rather Jax being in an emotion cloud linked to his father’s death.

Introducing Beau

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If I follow Jax and Brittany like hawks on social media, then I follow Stassi and her new man like a stage 5 clinger; my love for them is mad real. I’ve been Team Stassi ever since season one when she was a spoiled, little B. But I go totes hard for her now. I’m so proud of her for maturing and leaving her selfish ways behind in her 20s (I re. late. on another level to this), but one of the biggest changes in her life has been the presence of her new beau, Beau.

On Instagram, I love watching all their European adventures, their blossoming friendships with the entire cast (Stassi and Ariana besties? DREAM COME TRUE!), and Beau has even got Stassi into football. Last week’s episode proved it’s not always aperol spritz and sunshine for the two, but I’m confident nothing can break them up!

James’s (continued) Role as the Villain

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I think James is a good person. There I said it. You can see it through the financial support he provides his family, plus the pure love he has for them. I also think he realizes he has a role to play and that role is the pot stirrer, trouble maker, villain if you will. He’s taken over for Jax. Am I excusing all the horrible things James has said about the cast, especially the females?

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But I also have an extremely hard time believing he’s that way deep down as a human being in his daily life; I really do think there is some sort of alcohol dependency, mixed in with a need for some serious counseling.

Listen, I love seeing everyone get along. Believe me, I’d rather have an entire season with no fights because I love this group of people so much and I want them to all be best friends and live happily ever after forever. But come on, that doesn’t make for good TV. The reason VP has become so successful is credited to all the madness these people have gone through together over the past seven seasons. James is here this season to continue said madness (because it doesn’t seem like they’re going to be having it anytime soon with each other).

Finally …

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I will not talk poorly about anyone’s mother, so in regards to this week’s episode and Stassi’s mamma drama, I plead the fifth. However, I do have a few thoughts on everything else that took place:

  • As previously mentioned above, Beau and Stassi are the greatest. This episode solidified how Beau could not be more perfect. Don’t believe me? Go listen to her most recent podcast ep as well!
  • I applaud Lala for meeting with James and giving us another chance to see his human side. She said it best about how they need to be two humans who just have hearts and are showing kindness.
  • I had NO IDEA Robby Hayes from the Bachelor World would be on the show, let alone this week! AND come to find out, he’s Adam’s roommate? Scheana girl, what are you doing? No one thought she could look more desperate than last season with Rob, yet here we are!
  • I’m excited to see the girls host the Tuesday GNO at Sur on the next episode. If I remember correctly from social media, it was a pajama party and Billie Lee had some words for them on Twitter. Eager to watch it all unfold!

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“And the Golden Globe Goes to …”

I’ll never understand people who don’t love award shows. I have been staying up past my bedtime on the Sunday nights of award season since I was a little girl to see what beautiful gowns the actresses would wear and what movies everyone would be talking about. I remember in the 4th game, once a month we would play a current events Jeopardy-like game. I was always picked to answer any movie question, especially if one had recently one an award!

I mean we all want a peek into Hollywood, and award shows are the closest Hollywood parties for us regular folk to be invited to.  If you need further explanation, you can read my thoughts on last year’s Globes (75 Years of the Golden Globes!!). Anywhoooo, welcome to the 2019 Award Season!! Let’s GO!

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First Up: The Glam

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These four right here were my best dressed!  Sandra epitomized Hollywood glam on the red carpet, especially with that hair! Constance Wu can never do wrong for me, but she especially glowed in her feminine, cream dress with the burst of color red bow. I can only hope to age as well as Julia Roberts (and I always love me a well done pants outfit on the red carpet). And finally, Lupita Nyong’o POPPED in that blue, and had the perfect hourglass shape!

I loved Nicole Kidman’s maroon number, as well as Taraji P. Henson’s velvet dress. A few celebs (I feel) didn’t hit the fashion mark this year included Lucy Lu, Lili Reinhart, Amber Heard (ugh, especially her hair!) , and Lady Gaga (you can look up their dresses to see the awfulness). However, I did learn Lady Gaga payed homage to Judy Garland (visit my Instagram to see the comparison), and if so, then she gets a pass!

Next: The Hosts

I love the both of them, so I was already rooting for Sandra and Andy to win … and I think they did! My favorite bit was the mocking of Lady Gaga’s “100 people may be in a room … 99 may not believe in you…” because, unless you lived under a rock, you saw an interview where she said that quote. I also really liked the fake roast of celebs, the flu shots, and the mini montage to themselves! Finally, I just appreciated how genuine they both seemed, truly happy to be hosting, while not forcing jokes either. Bring them back next year!!

The Winners

**Please note:  A majority of this post was written after the Globes aired, while predictions and hopes below were written prior to the awards airing.**  Image result for happy face

BEST MOTION PICTURE – DRAMA

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Prediction: Black Panther … I’m actually torn here because the film did so insanely well, but did it do well enough to earn a superhero movie its first ever major award?
What I hope wins: A Star is Born (find my review here: Movie of the Week: A Star is Born)…it was also the only movie nominated that I saw ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Actual winner: Bohemian Rhapsody

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A MOTION PICTURE – DRAMA

Prediction: Nicole Kidman … she wins everything!
Who I hope wins: Lady Gaga (Can we please talk about Lady Gaga?)

Actual winner: Glenn Close

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A MOTION PICTURE – DRAMA

Prediction: Rami Malek or John David Washington
Who I hope wins: Bradley Cooper …while I may have not viewed the other noms’ films … Bradley Cooper was out. of. this. world. with his transformative performance of the troubled singer, Jack!

Actual winner: Rami Malek

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BEST MOTION PICTURE – MUSICAL OR COMEDY

Prediction: I think any film except Mary Poppins or Crazy Rich Asians could take this one!
What I hope wins: Crazy Rich Asians and once again, please check out another review by your girl: Movie of the Week: Crazy Rich Asians

Actual winner: Green Book

Are you noticing a trend? 

I seem to only want the winners to be films I’ve blogged about. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
As far as others I’d like to see win, the list includes:

  • Constance Wu
  • Claire Foy
  • Timothee Chalamet
  • “Shallow”
  • Jason Bateman

However, actual winners included:

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  • Richard Madden for Bodyguard … I have an episode and a half left of this; I really didn’t think he’d have a chance to win, but I’m so glad justice for Rob Stark was finally served!
  • Patricia Arquette won for some limited series, where I really would have liked to see Amy Adams for Sharp Objects or Connie Britton for Dirty John
  • “Shallow” –> yaaaaaaaassssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!!!!!!
  • That Sandra Oh win!! Gah the entire night was her night and I was HERE FOR IT!
  • Christian Bale and Glenn Close … Bravo! Brava!

Final Thoughts on the Show

I’m a bit disappointed in myself on my lack of preparation this year. I had to heavily research the movies nominated, and last year I had watched all but one of the television shows nominated for Best Drama (and I watched The Crown twice!); this year the total was zero. I did start Bodyguard … maybe I’ll find some motivation to finish it (especially since Richard Madden won Best Actor). Plus, my husband does like to start watching the Oscar nominated movies … so I’m sure we’ll start that list soon.

As far as the overall show, I was entertained, even if I didn’t know a majority of the nominees (I do have a homework list now!). I love love loved the Carol Burnett award, that we saw a montage of her show, and that this now brilliant award, named for her, will be passed on to television actors of my generation, who I grew up with and continue to watch!

Congratulations to all the winners! I definitely have a list of binge-worthy shows, and many new movies I can’t wait to watch, then review for you! As always, always, go find me on Twitter for even MORE fun, honest, real, brilliant, and hilarious thoughts on another great Golden Globes! (@myhollywoodh)

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Movie of the Week: Aquaman

I love a good superhero movie at Christmas …

Don’t you? Every year around this time, the hubs and I pick something worthy of a $10 movie ticket and head to the theaters. In 2018, this movie was Aquaman. I’ll say we picked it because there wasn’t much else to choose from; he’ll say we picked it because I have a undeniable liking for Jason Momoa.

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Okay, he’s right. Ever since Momoa played the great Khal Drogo in Game of Thrones, there has been mad love there.  I mean, didn’t everyone have a soft spot for Khal? Maybe he was “rough” in the beginning of his relationship with Daenerys, but he figured himself out, right? Plus, he was very sweet in the first book, well as sweet as Khal Drogo can be …

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So yeah, I’m a Jason Momoa fan. Although, now that I think about it, what else do I even like him from?

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Oh yeah, from his face.

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However, we aren’t here to only discuss Momoa, but rather his newest film, Aquaman,  in which he reprises his role of the famous sea hero, first seen in Justice League back in 2017.

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The basic plot of the movie is this:
Aquaman’s mother is ocean royalty (played by Nicole Kidman) but his father is human. It’a a little Hercules-esqe; similar “half-breed” drama without the spousal cheating. Aquaman isn’t accepted by the sea people and while he may be considered a hero by the humans, he’s still different (I mean, this “feeling left out in the human world” is in every superhero movie, is it not?).

Anyhoo, all the kings of the sea decide they’re going to band together and destroy humanity for polluting the oceans with garbage and sunken ships. So get excited, this isn’t just an action movie, but rather a call to action to clean up our water!

Because he’s both human and sea god, Aquaman is the perfect person to save the humans, and maybe rule the ocean as well … according to Mara (Amber Heard’s character, who we’ll get to shortly). All this fighting, and journeying, and cool underwater scenes take place, with you guessed it, Aquaman saving the day in the end.

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My husband isn’t one to live and die by superhero movies, so I was curious to hear his thoughts on the film. Mine were that Jason Momoa is fantastic at everything he does, even delivering cheesy one-liners these movies tend to have. Also, the fact that a majority of the scenes were underwater was cool to me. Other than that, the film had fighting and weird creatures, which I also thought was, as the kids say, bomb, tight, epic … perhaps even, badass?

Hubs said he felt the film was superbly done visually and I agree.

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As I just mentioned, the fact that a majority of the film took place underwater was something new and exciting to watch. Hubs did say he felt some of the movie was cheesy, obvs. I, especially, didn’t like the whole Manta/Yahya Abdul-Mateen II plot line. I understand that it established Aquaman’s desire to help the humans, plus set up **spoiler alert** a story line for a second film (anyone stay post credits?) … but I still thought it was unnecessary to the majority conflict (aka, a stupid subplot).

The last aspect of the film I want to discuss is the Amber Heard of it all. Raise your hand if you’ve seen an Amber Heard film?

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Okay, now raise your hand if you only really know Amber Heard from her marriage to and divorce from Johnny Depp?

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Heard is on the January cover of Glamour and I only bought it because I thought it was Lili Reinhart. Once I read the article and put it all together that it wasn’t Betty Cooper and was also the girl from Aquaman, I saw Heard in an entirely different light thinking back on the film. She did a great job portraying the love interest/sidekick … ?? Honestly I thought her role was kind of stupid because it seemed like she was only there to eventually fall in love with Aquaman, but it’s always refreshing to see a female lead kick some booty in a superhero film.

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Her red hair was totes fun too!

All in all, the movie was the perfect one to see post-Christmas, pre-New Year before we all get back into the grind of life. Speaking of grind, MHH’s 2019 New Year’s Resolution is to post once a week. This year is going to be a crazy one for me (I’ll reveal more in future posts), but as I always always say … I appreciate every single ounce of support from those of you who receive my posts via email, read them for fun, or follow me on social media! Cheers to a bright and fun new year!

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